if you want to be beautiful
buy flowers and take
them to the cemetery
if you want to be free
write a letter to the person
you hate most then realize
you do not hate them
if you want to be wild
wake up at 6 AM, drink
hot coffee and watch the
if you want to be happy
smile at every person
you see even if they aren’t
can calm itself,
so can you.
meditation, nayyirah waheed (via rabbrakha)
when did you realize that you had a problem? did others realize first or was it sort of you realizing what was happening?
One of my friends pointed out that I’d been talking a lot about feeling guilty when I ate, and that was really the first time I realized something must be slightly out of the ordinary, but I’d been concerned with food and my eating habits for so long that I didn’t think much of it. But I think I realized it was a real problem when I talked with my friend who had been in treatment earlier last year for her eating disorder, and she told me she was worried about me and had suspected that I might have a problem. My best friend sat on skype with me for an hour and a half in the middle of the night one time just so I wouldn’t feel alone when I ate something small. That was when I realized there was something wrong.
I think I realized what was happening, but I didn’t believe that I was “sick enough” to have a problem so I just ignored it. I guess it was a combination of the two. I’m really grateful for the people in my life who helped me realize I needed help though.
i dont want to really trigger you at all but i know you stated you've never gone underweight with your ed, but did you lose a significant amount or with the way you went in cycles did that never really happe?
I did lose a significant amount at first, but was never able to lose anything more than that amount. I lost 11lbs in three weeks, but when I would eat, I would put that weight back on, and it would take me longer to get back to my lowest weight each time.
Abortion seems to be the only medical procedure that people want to deny you based on how you got in that situation.
Drove drunk, got in an accident and need an organ transplant? No problem.
Messing around with a gun, accidentally shoot yourself in the leg and need surgery? Of course.
Smoke tobacco for most of your life and need treatment for lung cancer? Yep.
Climb a tree, fall out and break your leg? We’ll fix that right up.
Have sex and get pregnant when you don’t want to be? YOU GOT YOURSELF INTO THIS SITUATION AND YOU DESERVE NO MEDICAL HELP OR COMPASSION! THIS IS YOUR FAULT AND YOU WILL DEAL WITH THE CONSEQUENCES!”